July 2012
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Dear cat that is currently bothering me,
I understand that your owner is an elderly cat lady (who Vivian thinks is a satanist but in actuality is a morman, which is a lot worse) who neglects you while you meow long into the night. You are scrawny and cute, as any good alley cat should be. But you’re alone on this one, the only thing you’re getting from me is a bowl of windshield wiper fluid. Stay adorable and don’t try getting into my apartment, sincerely,
A dude who doesn’t care for your type or plight.
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“Sucking at something is the first step toward being kind of good at something.”
—Jake the Dog. (via sirmitchell)
im not your average asshole im an asshole with a blog
